Plaguing humanity, in general, is a failure to understand that humanity is divided into two personalities. Forget about racial, tribal, ethnicity or any other assumed divisions; either of the exposed two personalities causes the existence or non-existence of such conditions. It is a sheer waste of time and resources to aim at racism, class or any other manifestation of division. Those are the effects, resulting from the dichotomous conditions plaguing humanity. Handling the manifestation of all other conditions of conflicts becomes easy, as long as one has diagnosed the true characteristics of the two personalities. It may be surprising to some people that structural differences do not necessarily lead to divisions.
Members of the same family can experience greater division than those separated by cultural identities. Consider the division between Cain and Abel, culminating in Abel’s murder; yet they emerged as the initial progeny of Adam, undivided by any others. Similarly, a marriage can be strained by such dichotomies. Generally, people recognize the dichotomy of good and evil, which they believe is manageable. Should a consensus on the definitions of good and evil be reached, the likelihood of disputes arising from differences would diminish. However, this is unfeasible due to the two dichotomous personalities.
To understand the concept of contrasting personalities, it’s necessary to recognize the existence of both social and antisocial characteristics. I once found it hard to believe that a person could feel upset upon hearing about the successes of their relatives. As societies blend, it becomes more difficult to differentiate between antisocial and social tendencies. Nevertheless, certain traits can guide us in determining the company we keep. Grasping these distinctions is vital for effective engagement with diverse personalities.
It’s a misconception to think that all regular churchgoers are inherently social personalities; this is not the case. Such character traits are found across all groups, including in communist countries. Non-believers should not be stereotyped as anti-social. To underscore this, Jesus told the parable of the Good Samaritan. Regular churchgoers can be anti-social, just as non-believers can be sociable. Social personalities are present in all professions, even among those, typically, stigmatized. The case of Rahab the prostitute, as mentioned in Hebrews 11:31, serves as an illustration of this.
The most common trait of anti-social personalities is that they speak in generalities. That individual often judges others by the same standard, regardless of any wrongdoing committed by someone else. If the person gets ill-treated by one white fellow, he goes around stating that all whites are not good people. When a single robbery occurs in an area, individuals with anti-social tendencies may exaggerate and spread rumours of numerous robberies occurring there. Relying on such information could deter one from ever visiting that location.
A social personality is precise when recounting events, striving to present the truth based on facts without embellishment. However, there’s a tendency to downplay the gravity of situations, possibly diminishing their significance. This personality type aims to comprehend individuals independently of media reports. In contrast, a person with an antisocial personality may frequently spread unfounded rumours and malign others in their absence.
Individuals with antisocial personality traits may exhibit a deep-seated aversion to assisting those in need. They often hold the view that people merit their unfortunate circumstances and express animosity towards those attempting to provide assistance. Such individuals may take pleasure in witnessing the suffering of others, instead of extending help. This perspective sheds light on why some of the most nefarious dictators in history managed to attract significant support.
The followers of such despots find joy in the suffering of others, provided they remain unharmed. It is not necessarily true that the proponents of these tyrants lack faith; indeed, they may even garner more support from those identified as Christian believers. Socially conscious individuals become frustrated by this mistreatment of their fellow humans. They might even be willing to sacrifice for those who suffer, without expecting compensation. In Zimbabwe, some known people have been incarcerated and mistaken for being anti-establishment.
Another trait of antisocial personality disorder is a lack of respect for others’ property. For instance, if you lend your car with a full tank to such a person, it’s likely to be returned empty or with some damage. They often expect understanding without reciprocating. Marrying someone with these traits can be extremely difficult. A wife might frequently express feelings of being unloved, while a husband might shift all responsibilities to his wife, burdening her excessively.
On the other hand, a person with a social personality is likely to return your car with a full tank, even if they received it with less than a quarter tank. If you entrust your home to a social personality, they strive to leave it in better condition than they found it. Marrying someone with such traits is beneficial, provided one shares similar characteristics. Often, marital issues arise from pairing a social personality with an anti-social one; such a combination should be avoided due to the potentially severe consequences.
Another aspect is the not yet fully understood origin of psychosomatic illnesses, such as ulcers and high blood pressure, within marriages. Some medical professionals attribute these diseases to stress and depression without pinpointing the exact cause. The true root of such issues may lie in the clash of opposing personalities in marriages. A social individual may become depressed when living with an antisocial personality, who stays healthy as long as their partner is unwell. Conversely, if the social individual thrives despite this dynamic, it is the antisocial personality who might then suffer from similar health issues.
An individual with an anti-social personality may feel threatened by their partner’s success, such as a job promotion. Instead of celebrating, they might become agitated and level strange accusations, like alleging infidelity. They could also voice grievances about feeling disrespected or unloved. The accused partner might experience depression as a consequence. However, if the partner is cognizant of these dynamics, they may be able to cope effectively and maintain their success. This may lead to the antisocial individual being adversely affected, possibly falling sick as a result. The roots of certain unexplained mental illnesses might be the outcome of such incompatible marriages or other social relationships.
Armed with this knowledge and the ability to identify these personalities, a person can tackle such issues and help restore their partner’s health. At times, departing from an oppressive environment is essential for maintaining one’s well-being. Nevertheless, with a grasp of the relevant communication skills, one could effectively address the issue. Aside from infectious diseases, many common ailments like common flu, ulcers, and other psychosomatic illnesses stem from incompatible relationships. It is advised that an antisocial personality should not be paired in marriage with a social personality.
It is conceivable for an antisocial personality to marry another of the same disposition and achieve a successful marriage. Conversely, it is not advisable to pair opposites in this regard. Similarly, two social personalities can find happiness in marriage together. These issues are unrelated to financial means. A marriage may struggle despite ample finances if the partners are incompatible. While financial insufficiency may be cited as an excuse, it is not the root cause. Compatible partners can coexist harmoniously, even amidst extreme poverty.
Marriage counsellors often advise couples to pray together and attend church. However, some counsellors may not understand why partners, despite being devoted to the church, still face divorce. It requires a counsellor who understands the dynamics of differing personalities to address such issues effectively. Without this recognition, individuals may be left devastated. The prophet Amos stated, “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” (Amos 3:3). This implies that fundamentally opposite individuals may not be suitable marriage partners.
Church leaders often counsel members to marry within the same faith, which can result in a certain grandiosity in so-called ‘white weddings.’ Yet, these can also culminate in unexplained bitter divorces. Differences in education cannot present problems, as well, as long as the couple is appropriately matched. Finding a spouse within a church is immaterial; the true importance lies in the compatibility of personality traits between partners. This concept remains valid irrespective of one’s commitment to Christian faithfulness. Identifying specific personality traits in individuals is crucial to addressing the rising divorce rates.
Cain’s discord with his brother Abel was rooted in their contrasting personalities. Cain displayed antisocial behaviour, while Abel had opposing qualities. The biblical story captures these distinct characters to emphasize the dynamics of such differences. It signifies the beginning of Adam’s descendants, with no mention of Adam’s response to Abel’s murder by Cain. One symbolizes the son of man, and the other, is the Son of God. The tale implies that sin emerges from the clash of these traits, which, if aligned, could foster unity. Finding commonality does not, necessarily, require individuals to be of the same gender.
God witnessed the increase of sin when two distinct personalities intermarried, a mistake that led to the merging of incompatible traits. The manifestation of sin emerged from this union. It is believed that those who suffer from ulcers or other psychosomatic illnesses do so due to the sin of such incompatible unions. This displeased God, leading to a reduction in the lifespan of those individuals. Sin, then, is the consequence of merging two elements that should remain separate, akin to the spark created when negative and positive charges meet.
Sin can be characterized in various forms, yet it is often the merging of two dichotomies that leads to other sins. For example, an individual might turn to alcohol or drugs due to stress in their marriage. They might also be drawn to someone who shares a similar personality trait, leading to adultery. Despite attempts to resist, the struggle may persist, primarily due to a lack of understanding of the underlying issues. Even after undergoing counselling, the individual might not achieve success in overcoming these challenges.
Marriage is beneficial, yet for a Christian, it may be considered a significant commitment, particularly if the union turns out to be incompatible. Individuals might recognize these traits in each other, but the challenge lies in the inherent changeability of human nature. For example, a couple may marry as anti-social personalities, but what occurs if one partner chooses to embrace Christianity? Conversely, the situation could arise if one partner moves away from faith. Trusting humans can be profoundly challenging, given their capacity for unexpected change.
In our society, someone can exhibit both antisocial and social personality traits. Often, a person may show predominantly social traits while still possessing some antisocial tendencies. It’s important to consider the relative intensity of these traits. If you consider yourself a social individual but recognize more antisocial traits in a potential partner, it might be wise to steer clear. The only complexity of human nature lies in its capacity for change, transforming individuals into someone quite different from who they were before marriage.
The world is defined by two distinctly opposite personality traits among those observed. While marriage has been a primary focus, this insight could apply to various relationships. Potential employees, for instance, might be assessed on these traits to determine their fit. This extends to any social organization or club. In Zimbabwean politics, particularly within the opposition, voters have faced disappointments due to a lack of awareness of these traits. Knowing what to look for and using these personality traits, makes it impossible to vote wrongly.
Voting for an individual with an antisocial personality often leads to undesirable outcomes. Unfortunately, many people are swayed to support such individuals, due to ignorance or shared anti-social traits. This underscores the adage that ‘knowledge is power.’ Without it, one is susceptible to manipulation by others. This situation is exacerbated when antisocial personalities assume roles of religious leadership, using faith as a means to influence the vulnerable. Individuals with anti-social personalities often possess a charismatic charm, employing emotional persuasion to influence their followers.
On Judgement Day, people will not be judged according to their religious persuasion. They will be judged according to the nature that distinguishes them to be either social or anti-social. Those deemed acceptable are those aligning with being social. Whereas, those deemed unacceptable, as to be rewarded with the fiery furnace, are the anti-social. The anti-social character finds it extremely difficult to exercise love towards other fellow humans.
It is believed that the second coming of Jesus will usher in a period of global peace and contentment, where governments will meet the needs of all. During this time, Satan, who is thought to be the source of such disorder, will have been cast into the abyss. This era of peace is anticipated to last a thousand years. However, there will still be individuals who are dissatisfied with these circumstances. They will adhere to the government’s rule due to a lack of alternatives. Nevertheless, it is foreseen that their true disposition will emerge at the end of the millennium when the instigator of discord is released from his confinement.
“Now when the thousand years have expired, Satan will be released from his prison and will go out to deceive the nations which are in the four corners of the earth, Gog and Magog, to gather them together to battle, whose number is as the sand of the sea. They went up on the breadth of the earth and surrounded the camp of the saints and the beloved city. And fire came down from God out of heaven and devoured them. The devil, who deceived them, was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone where the beast and the false prophet are. And they will be tormented day and night forever and ever” (Revelation 20:7-10 ESV).
It is not deemed unfair when such individuals face severe consequences. No other method seems effective in deterring their antisocial behaviour. Despite their physical existence offering them a chance to reform, their predisposition towards antisocial tendencies prevails. They find it easier to embrace antisocial behaviour than to engage in social interactions, which they perceive as challenging. In a gesture of fairness, God permits Satan to return after the millennium, presenting them with a familiar path, albeit one that leads to their demise.
Andrew Masuku is the author of Dimensions of a New Civilization, laying down standards for uplifting Zimbabwe from the current state of economic depression into a model for other nations worldwide. A decaying tree provides an opportunity for a blossoming sprout. Written from a Christian perspective, the book is a product of inspiration, bringing relief to those having witnessed the strings of unworkable solutions––leading to the current economic and social decay. Most Zimbabweans should find the book as a long-awaited providential oasis of hope, in a simple conversational tone.
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